Do you need a solution for older kids bedwetting that the child is more likely to accept? I have a solution for you to help older kids who wet the bed. This solution is easy and simple and keeps their pajamas dry.
This post contains my personal opinions as a mom and does not replace consulting a medical professional. Always consult a qualified medical professional with concerns. I am a mom and a writer with work history as a pediatric RN. This post is intended for children without any contributing medical conditions.
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Nighttime potty training can be a tough process and ongoing for some children for many years. Nighttime dryness is easier for some kids and harder for others. In my house, nighttime bed wetting was a problem so I’m sharing my experience as a mom and my mom-hack solution to this very real problem. My kids have also gone through cycles where they are dry for many nights, then wet again until finally dry all night.
When the Problem Continues for Older Kids
In my experience as a mom I’ve found nighttime potty training has more to do with the individual child, the child’s personality, and genetics rather than the method used to potty train. I knew I had to wait for their bodies to outgrow this problem so I found a product that made our lives better (scroll down for the link).
Most kids are fully potty trained before the age of five. But for some kids they continue to still have accidents during the night for years beyond the age of five, sometimes until the age of ten. While the initial daytime potty training can be difficult, ongoing nighttime bed wetting for older kids is far worse. Older kids become more embarrassed and guilt stricken the longer this problem goes on. There are the nighttime pants out in the stores these kids can wear, but they are so diaper-like that older kids who wet the bed eventually refuse to wear them out of embarrassment. They see them as more of a diaper than a solution to their problem. Plus, when older kids are forced to wear the absorbent pants, this instills a fear of being found out and teased by peers in sleepover situations.
Related post: How to Host a Fun and Successful Kids Sleepover
Related post: 7 Tips to Survive Hosting a Kids Birthday Party
We Needed a Solution
As a busy mom, I didn’t want to wash sheets (or big bed pads) every day because of nightly bed wetting, so wearing just underwear to bed for a consistent nighttime wetter didn’t work. The kid wakes up wet and the mattress may take a hit of urine if it penetrates the moisture proof mattress pad. For my family, limiting liquids for the child and having him urinate before bed still did not stop bed wetting. I did not want to try the medication or alarm route so I began brainstorming about potential solutions to our problem.
My Revelation: The Mom Hack Solution
One day a mom hack hit me as I was walking through a store. A mom hack that allowed me to get my son willing to wear nighttime urine protection. I started to buy the urine pads called Guards or shields made by Depend for men or the pad made for women works for girls. It’s like a maxi pad but it’s meant for urine and it’s made for adult males or females, not babies or toddlers. The pad has a sticky side to attach to underwear so the child can even wear his own underwear to bed. This is a huge bonus for older children.
I had found a solution that worked for our family. My child didn’t have to wear the diaper-like pants anymore. He was protected from leaks as was the bed, and it was easier to hide urinary leak protection at sleepovers. The sleepover factor becomes huge for kids because this secret is not one kids would want broadcasted.
Just like any solution it was not fail proof. It would leak on occasion but for the most part it made not only his life better, but mine too because there weren’t any more struggles about wearing protection at night.
Tips on How to Hide Nighttime Bed Wetting For Sleepovers
For sleepovers at a friend’s house have your child bring their whole overnight bag to the bathroom to put the pad in their underwear in privacy. Once the pad is in place, tell your child to avoid wrestling with the friend to prevent the pad from being discovered (boys like to wrestle, this may not be a problem for girls). Pack a ziplock bag in the overnight bag so your child can put the pad in it in the morning and dispose of it at home. Again they should bring their overnight bag to the bathroom to get dressed in the morning to conceal the pad. This way their friend doesn’t even need to know and the pad won’t get found in the garbage by anyone.
Have the child bring their own sleeping bag to the sleepover. This way if the pad does leak the sleeping bag should absorb the urine. The sleeping bag can easily be washed at home and the accidental leak never has to be discovered.
Benefits for Moms
The bonus part for moms in addition to less laundry is a financial benefit. The Depend® pads are cheaper than the other nighttime pants plus I often found coupons. The pack also has a higher count so I would buy them less frequently than I had to buy the traditional night time absorbent pants. This was a win-win solution that reduced my son’s humiliation due to bed wetting and allowed for sanity at bedtime.
Another Bonus
We didn’t need to resort to any uncomfortable plastic sheets or other bed pads that would protect the bed but not the pajamas. The urine would soak into the pad most of the time and allow for uninterrupted sleep. Eventually my kids outgrew the nighttime bedwetting.
Check your flex spending policy because many companies reimburse for urinary incontinence products, mine does.
From mom to mom, let me tell you this switch was a lifesaver and got us through many rough patches!
There are medical conditions that can cause ongoing nighttime bed wetting. A doctor should be consulted with any concerns a parent has about nighttime bed wetting.
Amazon Affiliate link:
Depend For Men Incontinence Guards, Maximum Absorbency 52 ea
Or, I have also used the generic brands with some success, but honestly, we’ve had the most luck with the Depend® brand. As another alternative, washable absorbant pads for the bed can be found online, however, I like the pad option better because their underwear and pajamas stay dry with the pad (occasional leaks of course). These pads may work great for kids trasitioning out of the underwear shields however. Here is the link on Amazon to the washable pads: Waterproof Reusable Incontinence Bed Pads Washable Incontinence Underpads 8 Cups Absorbency，Non-Slip Mattress Protector for Adults, Kids and Pets(34”x 36” inch 2 Pack)
To read the other installments of my Children’s Healthcare Series click this link https://www.juliehoagwriter.com/childrens-healthcare-series/
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OMG! Thank you so much for sharing. My soon to be 7 year old is a bedwetter still and the limit liquids etc does not work at all for us either. I bought goodnights but bc they fit like a diaper he pees in them and I switched to their new product that is made like underwear with the inserts but the liners are very expensive for only 18 of them and HARD to find in the stores now. I ended up ordering some off Ebay bc I was at my wits end with buying the goodnights pull up type pants. I will def try this because I don’t want to use the alarm either it seems traumatic to me.
We tried the inserts too but we had the same issue with them being hard to find, expensive, and bulky. Plus I had to wash the underwear all the time as we only had 4 of them. With the Depend ones the child can use his own underwear and they are WAY cheaper, plus they come with more in a pack. I hope using these works for your son! We did get a few leaks here and there but overall it worked so much better. I just had to wait for him to grow out of bedwetting, but these made it all so much better and easier to bear. Thanks!!
I’ll give them a try. My soon to be first grader isn’t phased by a wet pullup in the morning and won’t change out of it until he’s told. Ugh. Hopefully having him sleep in these with his own underwear will help.
I hope it does help. For some kids, this does seem to help. Many take a long time before it bothers them though, unfortunately.
My little guy will be 5 this month and is such a sound sleeper that he’s the same way. I’ve limited liquids and TRIED to wake him (he just flips over and starts snoring again). We have the Goodnights Trufit as well, but I use cloth (hemp to be exact) inserts. Much cheaper and eco-friendly than the disposable ones. I cloth diaper the 2 year old, so his overnights just get tossed in with baby sister’s diapers.
Those are great ideas! Night time bed wetting is a huge problem. Finding a solution that works for your family and child is the best way to go!! Thanks for the comment!
My son is closer to 6 and still having night accidents.
But this tip came from a friend whose 11/12 year old is still peeing at night.
She bought some plastic shower curtains and puts that under his sheet. Then it’s just changing the sheet and wiping down the plastic, so less laundry.
Yes, that is a great idea!!! Older kids get embarrassed by this so anything to make them less embarrassed is a win. Thanks for sharing!
It is so good to hear mums sharing their experiences about their child’s bedwetting. A lot of parents give their children milk at night time and that can increase bedwetting. Check out this website for a good alternative to the alarm. It is a gentle solution to bedwetting for older children.
Yes, there are alternatives to the alarm and from my experience kids will eventually grow out of it at some point, it’s just about getting through that rough time of bedwetting as an older child and still being able to do fun things like sleepovers. Thanks!
Thanks for sharing! Thankfully, we haven’t had to deal with this, but I’m sure it can be frustrating for child and parent, alike.
Yes, very frustrating which is what drove me to find some fixes for it. Thanks!
Your son is lucky to have you, these are such awesome solutions!
Thanks! They were born out of necessity and they really helped us get through the rough patch.
This is brilliant! While I’m not a mother yet, I can definitely see how this can be a difficult challenge to overcome (for both the child and parent). It’s a great idea to have your child bring the overnight bag into the bathroom so the pad is never discovered by friends!
– Kaitlin
kedgotwed.com
Yes, there are many ways around it to make it work for these kids plagued by bedwetting at an older age. I really hope my suggestions and tips help families. Thanks so much!!
This is so helpful! We plan on fostering and this is a major problem among foster children. What a great way to fix the problem without embarrassing them! Thank you!
I’m so happy my suggestions can help you and your family and the foster kids! That is so awesome you plan to foster, there is such a need for families who foster. I hope my tips help kids. I think there is always a solution, sometimes we just have to look harder to find it. Thanks, and good luck!!
Great hack! Anything that can make things easier for you and your kiddo.
Yes, exactly! I hope my post helps other families. Thanks!
what a great idea i will have to try these on our two boys 8 & 10 who both still struggle to stay dry at night and both have been invited on a sleepover
Yes, it is such a struggle. These kids need more options that the kiddie pants, they are too old for that. The bed pads are nice too, but they don’t work for sleepovers, but the personal guards work great to keep hidden and catch urine leaks at night. It’s a struggle, but kids do eventually outgrow it, as parents, we just need to get them through it. Thanks for your comment and I hope my tips help:)
i got the guards for the boys to wear in their underwear and work really well but now the younger one is leaking nearly every night so he wears size 6 nappies to bed the older one is doing well with the guards and is now looking forward to his residential trip with the school in two weeks time both boys have even started putting one in their underwear for school just incase
Oh, that is good that this is working for your older one and that he can do his trip with greater ease now. I’m so glad my tips helped you! The leaking is tough. You could try larger pads of different brands as an option too. I really like the shape of the Depend because it is sort of curved. I hope you find a working solution for your younger one that he will tolerate.
Omg thank you! I am a little late to the party here but I just wanted to tell you this is a brilliant idea and you may have possibly changed our lives. What a struggle it has been. I am running out to the store tomorrow to get then.
I’m so glad to hear this! It is a struggle for older kids with this issue. It has been a struggle in our family too, clearly genetic for us, but a small percent of older kids continue to wet the bed. The Depend are the best, I think it’s because of their shape. We’ve tried generic brands, but we have had only partial success, the size and shape of the Depend pad for men is perfect. I love that kids can even wear their own underwear too, be more like the big kid they are, the disposable pants just don’t work for older kids. Washable bed pads are a nice option, but if the kids wet frequently, their pj’s and the sheets/blankets get soaked too, so it doesn’t work as well. The Depend pads aren’t perfect of course, we have occaisional leaks, but overall, the success with them is high for us. Good luck and I’m so happy to have helped you out with my idea!!
Thanks for this post! My 7 and 10 year old are still not dry overnite. We use this same concept! I combine Poise pads (for my daughter) with the GoodNites underwear. Much cheaper than the GoodNites liners, but you still get the added protection of the GoodNites undies. They are cloth and look like regular underwear, in cute colors. A tip if anyone goes this route… don’t remove the protective strip from the adhesive on the Poise liners. The GoodNites underwear will hold the pad in place and it makes it easy to just remove the underwear and turn it upside down over the trash can. My kids both manage this themselves each morning. My son is just transitioning to this method, so I’ll try the Depends that you recommend first!
It’s such a struggle for older kids isn’t it? I don’t know why the liners for kids are so much more expensive, that is great that you found a solution for your daughter that works and is cheaper!! I love how they can look like regular underwear, this is huge for the older kids’ self-esteem with this bedwetting issue. Wonderful tips! I am so happy you found a solution and shared it so other families dealing with this issue can try it out. Thanks so much!!!
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Thank you.
Thank you! My 8 year old step son just moved in with us from his mom’s house. She has had him in Good Nights and other nighttime diapers forever. He soaks them every night and leaks onto the sheets. I am picking up some Depends pads on my way home tonight and I’m excited for him to try them! Fingers crossed! Want him to be able to enjoy sleepovers with his friends!
I really hope the solution works for him! The kids need to make sure the pad is placed properly too, a more forward placement has helped us for boys. Adding an absorbent washable pad over the top of the sheet helps too for leaks, then you just have to wash the pad and not the entire set of sheets. On occasion, we will have leaks even with the pads, so I often will add that pad if leaks seem to be happening. It always has fluctuated with us. I always felt like there were more leaks during growth spurts. The pads are great for sleepovers too!
My 8 year old son suddenly started wetting the bed once a week after being completely dry for the last 2 years. And now there’s a sleepover coming up this weekend and I’m frantically searching for some Goodnites tru-fit underwear so that its not obvious he’s wearing anything, those diaper style underpants are so bulky. But stores apparently don’t carry the Tru-fit anymore and I don’t have enough time to order online. Thank you so much for your suggestion, would have never thought of it. This is what I’m going to do for this weekend’s sleepover!
Hello, this situation is so frustrating for both parents and kids. I love this pad solution because they are always available in the stores, at a cheaper price, and are more discreet (and I’ve found coupons are easier to come by too). I sincerely hope this works for your son at the sleepover. We have had great success using these pads for sleepovers over the years. I hope your son has a wonderful time:)
I recently thought of using the men’s guard pads in the goodnight trufits. This seems like it would help with leaking issues. I haven’t tried it yet because I’m using up other things. I don’t know if they’ll fit. My 7-year-old is a wild sleeper as well as an extra heavy sleeper. He moves all over the bed when he sleeps and contorts into all sorts of positions. So just an absobant pad in regular underwear doesn’t work.
I think it’s a great idea to use the pads in the goodnight underwear. I think it would work out great because they also have a sticky side to help it stay put, kind of like a maxi pad. I hope it works out for you. Another trick I’ve done is to layer several waterproof mattress pads on top of each other, so if the child wakes at night it a simply stripping off of one mattress pad and then there is already one on underneath that should be dry. I hope you have success.
I had the same problem with my older daughter, moving all over the bed and an insane amount of pee at night. We tried everything, including the pad, maxipad, booster pad in the pull-up… at some point nothing worked. We switched to regular adult diapers with maximum absorbency, the classic ones with side sticky tabs, and from this moment we’ve never had leaks and wet stuff. Differently from what I thought the “adult” diapers are available in small and extra-small size, someone even in “youth” size. So if they pee a lot and the pad trick doesn’t work, that is the perfect more simple solution. Much less expensive considering the cost of pullup+pad+mattress pad+laundry and just only a simple adult diaper that is half the price of a pullup.
This is a great option! Thanks for the advice!! I hope this idea helps out other readers:)
Thank you for this helpful advice.
You are very welcome. I hope my post helps. Take care. Thank you!
I’m currently investigating “hacks” before my 8 year-old son heads to overnight camp. I looked at the mens’ guards and wondered if they work, but it sounded they were just for “leaks.” Will they work if they fully pee during the night? Will they absorb 10-12 oz of urine? I couldn’t find any info about their capacity…
They have worked all night for my sons, though on occasion they leaked. However, they seemed to hold a good amount in my opinion. You could also use the briefs and the pad if you feel like he goes a lot at night. Hope it helps him out, it’s so hard for older kids to have this happen.
Our 16 year old daughter is a bedwetter and she wears regular cloth pin on diapers and adult size plastic pants to bed everynight.We have hard water and after washing her rubberpants,i hang them up to dry and after a while there are hardwater spots on them.Anyone got a solution for this?
No, I don’t. But maybe if you got a water softener and added salt, that might help perhaps. It helps with our glasses to prevent white spots and streaks on those.
To janice-Our daughter is 16 also and i was her rubberpants in hard water,then put them in the drier on the ‘fluff’ setting which is very low heat.It dries the water spots quickly and there are hardly any hard water spots.
Nice. I’m glad that works out.
No one here has mentioned anything about girls in puberty and bedwetting! It does happen and our daughter is 14 and nearing the end of her puberty,but still bedwetting.Like Janice’s daughter,our daughter has been wearing the cloth diapers and rubberpants since she first started bedwetting before age 12.Her cloth diapers have velcro on them so i dont have to worry about diaper pins.Her rubberpants are all adult size and fit blousy over her diapers for comfort.All of her rubberpants are in pastels and nursery prints and she like the nursery prints the most.She knows of two other girls who are like her in puberty and bedwetting and also wear the cloth diapers and rubberpants as well.
Yes, I’m sure it happens to girls too. Very frustrating. My kids are all boys, so that’s why I’ve only addressed this in regards to raising boys. It’s very frustrating, but a small portion of kids suffer from this. Mine eventually outgrew it. I hope things improve for her.
Bedwetting is a condition that affects some families, I was plagued with enuresis till I turned 13, back in the 60’s (I was the eldest of 3, my siblings were not affected, but one cousin endured it as well until puberty). Out of my 3 sons only the second one was affected till 13 as well, my eldest grand child is only 7 and still wets at nite.
My mum forced me into vinyl pants + disposable baby pads, my matress was covered with a noisy waterproof sheet under the regular one, I was finally cured using a pad & bell alarm (it took almost 3 months) I do remember the permanent fear that my problem would be disclosed to peers! I never went to summer or ski camps before being cured.
I remember mum’s disapointment whenever waking me up for school as she discovered humid sheets to be removed.
My wife had a totally reverse attitude towards my son: goodnites pants were available but he sedomly wore them at home, she didn’t comment at all and endured the washings with great patience, but at the end of the day the result was similar… Opposite to me, my son accepted to go to summer camps and week long school-trips ( using DDVAP + goodnites ) In the 90’s teachers informed parents that enuresis was not a valid reason for kids not to join the trip, and insisted that for 3rd or 4th graders they expected that 2 or 3 bedwetters in the group.
I’m so sorry for what you endured. I’m so happy to hear how your own wife dealt with the issue. Kids don’t do this on purpose. We found ways around it that weren’t demeaning, like washable pads on top of the mattress, goodnites, and depends. We washed a lot of bedding that’s for sure. Kids will usually eventually outgrow it, but it’s so hard when it goes on so long and affects a child’s enjoyment of fun overnight events. I hope parents are compassionate with kids with this issue, no kid WANTS this to happen to them. Thanks for your comment, it may help others to know they are not alone with this issue.
I know this post is old, but my son is 13 and wets almost every night. I found this post when looking for solutions to help contain his wettings. When shopping in the boys department, all that is available in his size are boxer briefs…will this work with boxer briefs or should I try to find regular boys briefs for him?
My boys used boxer briefs with the pads so it should work. This pad is discreet and curved to the body so it should work for him. Good luck. I know how frustrating it can be both for him and for you.
A genetic thing here to. Have 2 bedwetters ages 7 and 5, regular wetter’s and tried the pull ups, Goodnites, Underjams with pads and had leaks to often and wound up washing bed clothes and sheets and all. Finally in exasperation and something someone else made mention of elsewhere I tried cloth diapers and plastic pants. Absolutely no more leaks and everyone gets a full nights sleep. Giving some serious thought to what you did though and it sounds worth a try. Your kids seemed ok with it too.
Yeah, it’s quite the struggle. The pads worked well for us yes. Plus adding a pad to the bed above the top sheet that can tuck in is nice too so then you just wash that pad. I hope things work out. It’s hard on the kids and the parents to have this type of situation, but definitely does seem to have a genetic component. Good luck and I wish you the best.
I recall having some unexpected bed wetting issues many years ago when I was a very young teenage boy of around 13 years old. I was crazy about drinking soda-pop at that time, and one night drank a lot of soda-pop right before going to bed. The weather was very warm, and my mother gave me permission to sleep naked, if I wanted to. That next morning, I woke up, and found that I had kicked off my bed covers, and was laying naked on top of my bed sheets. Because I drank so much soda-pop the night before, I had a very strong urge to go. About this time, I heard my mother walking towards my bedroom to wake me up. My mother usually always woke me up each morning. I didn’t know what to do, so I flung both of my arms up over my head, tightly squeezed my legs together, and shut both of my eyes, as if I were still sound asleep. I then heard my mother slowly open my bedroom door, step in, then quietly shut my bedroom door. My mother then quietly walked over to my bed, and sat on the edge of my bed. I remember hoping that my mother would just leave, so that I could get up and go to the bathroom, but my mom began massaging my leg. My mother would sometimes do this when she was waking me up, and I’ll admit that this was a nice way to wake up. I started pretending that I was just waking up, by stretching my arms and legs. As I started to sit up in my bed, it was too late, as I started uncontrollably squirting everywhere. I guess that I couldn’t hold it any longer, and just started going. I remember it squirting up into the air, and spraying down on my legs, my bed sheets, my bedroom floor, and my mother getting her nightie wet. For a moment after going, nothing was said, as my mother just sat there staring at me. I thought my mother was going to be very angry with me; but to my surprise, she pulled me towards her, and hugged me for quite awhile. As my mother hugged me, she kept whispering to me that everything was okay, and that there was nothing for me to worry about. After hugging, mom sat there holding both of my hands, and we talked about trying to pee in the toilet. My mother has passed some years ago, but I will always remember her loving patients towards me that day that I wet my bed.
A mother’s patience is unmatched. That is nice that she didn’t get angry at you. Kids cannot help it when they wet the bed so there is no reason to get angry with them. They don’t like it either.
My mother was always very patient, and loving towards me. I was adopted at birth, and I never felt like I didn’t belong. I can remember many times when it seemed like my mother should have been very angry with me; but instead, she showed love, and understanding. After having a bed wetting incident one morning, when I was around 13 years old, I helped my mother change out my bed sheets, and she laid down a plastic mattress cover, and other protective plastic. As my mother was protecting my bed, she confided in me that she had to do the same thing to her bed, as she sometimes had morning wetting accidents. Right around this same time, I badly injured my left ankle playing basketball at my school, and ended up being bedridden for about two weeks. So there I was, laying on top of my bed sheets, wearing only my undershorts, with my left ankle elevated on pillows. I had torn ligaments in my left ankle, and I was supposed to stay in my bed, with my left ankle elevated on pillows, until the swelling in my left ankle went down. The doctor also told my mother that I was to drink plenty of water, as this would aid in the healing process. During the time that I was bedridden, my mother was a great caregiver, as she was always walking into my bedroom to check on me, and make sure that I had plenty of cold water to drink. My swollen left ankle was very painful, and my mother eventually gave me a mild pain pill that the doctor prescribed. I fell asleep, and woke up sometime later with a very strong urge to go. My mother wasn’t around, and I must have still been half asleep. I sat on the edge of my bed, removed my undershorts, and stood up on my good leg. Just as I stood up, my mother quickly entered my bedroom, stood by my side, and put her arm around me holding me tight. Right at that moment, I uncontrollably peed on my bedroom floor. When I started peeing, my mother reached down with her other hand, and aimed my pee stream. I think I had hard wood flooring in my bedroom, and I really peed a lot on it. After going, my mother helped me get re-situated back into my bed. She cleaned up my bedroom floor without a word of anger, and reassured me that everything was okay, and hugged me. Later that day, my mother came into my bedroom with a home-made cloth diaper, and put it on me, attaching it with two safety pins. She told me to let her know when I had to go, as she could help me with that. She also told me that if she wasn’t around, I could just go in the cloth diaper, as my bed was well protected. I wore the cloth diaper off and on during this time, and ended up peeing in the cloth diaper a few times. My mother never belittled me, embarrassed me, or never really seemed to get angry with me. She was always very understanding, and helpful to me, especially during the times of my unfortunate situations.
That’s wonderful that your mother was so understanding and supportive during your difficult times with incontinence. It’s a very tough thing to deal with and embarrassing. I’m so happy to hear your mother helped you through this time. That’s what a mother should do. Thank you for sharing your story.
I just happened on this site and enjoyed reading the customization noted for a boy and dealing with nighttime enuresis(NE) for his undergarment wetting protection. I am adding a bit of another item and that is the support not only a mother can provide but also a father should do. Several decades ago at age 4 I wore training underwear and plastic underpants(pp) at night. I was a sporadic wetter at night with an average of wet underpants about 50 – 75% of the time. We did not have Goodnights or other specialized bw options but my trainers & pp worked well until at age 7 I was dry at night. However after age 8 I started having issues again and I had to start wearing youth diapers and pp because of the higher quantity of liquid. At first it was degrading to me but my mother always kept her support and inspiration and actually being able to wake up with dry sheets and pjs and with a good night’s sleep of no worries this was the best for me. I asked my mother about what my father thought of me with my bw issue and she said he was proud of me for taking the responsible steps at night yet he never told me this or indicated it himself. I never asked him. I was afraid he would have given me a more honest semi-negative response. I had a good relationship with my dad but we never spoke of my nighttime condition.
Fast forward to my eldest son that had NE the longest of our children and though Goodnights worked fine and he always had a plastic cover on his bed, we eventually had to have him wear his regular boy briefs & pp over them at age 9. At age 10 he began to leak from those and we had to move him into the same situation I had done in my youth at age 8. He was devastated at the thought of diapers and then this was the time I knew I had to sit down with him and explain my wearing of cloth diapers and pp until about age 13. He was a bit shocked at first, to me admitting this but I assured him I got through it and so could he. This changed everything for him. My wife handled the pinning of his diapers and he would pull on his pp each night. I always made sure I spoke to him before bed about what was going on for him the next day to keep that unashamed connection with him. By age 12 he was handling getting his own diaper in place with his pp each night and though we tried disposable youth diapers for a while, the cost was a bit high and he even settled on wanting the cloth diapers and pp since my wife was doing quite well in that laundry area and with little to very few times with wet sheets. It was also good that diapers & pp have come a long way as colors and patterns for both are numerous and he even began to pick out his “style” when he was 12 -13.
He had yearly doctor visits over these first 16 years and thankfully there was nothing medically wrong but by then the medical profession had correlated a lot to the father passing possibly this gene to his sons. He did much better in school after age 10 and was in several extra curricular activities each year. He had plenty of friends and told me his best friend knew of his night time condition and thought vey little of it (made sleepovers easy). I always believed it was because I had the talk of father to son regarding my night time undergarments and daily support from his mother AND FATHER that made a big difference.
At age 13 he could easily sit by us before bedtime in only his pj top and his diaper / pp and think nothing of it. By 14 he started having more dryer nights and eventually by age 15 his NE was to the level that he was back into training underwear and pp. By 16 my wife began to notice he still had some damp trainers about 1 a week or even less and I approached him about trying to get into regular boys underwear again. He was very concerned about doing this but once again I assured him I supported him if he wanted to stay a while longer in his trainers and pp or try a few nights each week in regular boy briefs. We eventually worked out a plan he would try boy briefs 1-2 nights each week and then switch back to his trainers and pp and then the following week do this trial again. I reminded him several times that I would not be disappointed if he had a wet sheet once in a while why he tested his goal of being dry at night and wearing regular underwear. Like me by age 14, he eventually grew out of his NE by the middle of age 17.
Thank you so much for sharing all of your history and your son’s history with us. This will be helpful to many families dealing with such issues I’m very sure of that. It’s such a hard thing to deal with, but as you pointed out by the end, all kids do tend to outgrow this, if there are no physical reasons for it. Some great take away pointers for parents of kids who do wet at night, be supportive of your child. They aren’t doing this on purpose and it probably bothers them more than it bothers you. So being supportive and not treating them as inferior is very very important for their mental health and growth. They need support mentally, physically, and socially for this problem. Parents can provide this by talking with them, not treating them differently, and maintaining modesty, privacy, and respect for them as an individual. Thank you again and this is a hugely valuable history that I have no doubts will help others dealing with nighttime enuresis.
My daughter is 8 and is very wet every night. It runs in our family. My father and I both dealt with it late into our teens. She is embarrassed and wishes she didn’t still wet the bed at night. We have tried different nighttime pull-ups and poise pads, etc. but nothing was a great solution. She is big for her age and all of these products leak regularly. I have been searching hi and low for a solution, but there doesn’t seem to be much geared towards older kids. I stumbled upon SUPER UNDIES and specifically their HERO line. Made for bigger kids and heavy soakers. They are bulky, but look like underwear with a regular elastic band so they look like undies peaking out the top, not a diaper or pull up. These are cloth underwear with a snap in liner and a “booster” pad that goes in this liner. My daughter was in tears with excitement when these came in the mail and after a week of use, we have not had one leak! And she is proud of how they look. I am so grateful for this brand and their products for big kids. Superundies.com
Oh thank you for this tip! I hope others can find this product as well. It’s so frustrating for the child, and for the parent. I’m so happy you found a solution and what a great boost to her confidence if she has not leaked and is ok with how they look. Those are such important things. Good luck and thanks for the idea!
You are a GENIUS. Trying this tonight. Thanks for sharing!!
I hope it works for you and your child:)