Dear Boys, My Dear Wonderful Boys,
I love you more than I could ever say. No words could ever be enough to explain how much you all mean to me. You all changed my life for the better. I was living my life selfishly before you were born. It was all about me and my life. Once I had you each as a baby in my arms, my life became about each of you.
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What You Taught me as Babies
Oldest, When You Were a Baby
Oldest, you taught me so much about being a mom. I learned I could do more than I ever thought possible. I could sleep less, eat less, have less leisure time, clean less, shop less, talk on the phone less, read less, and do less and still be happier than I ever thought I could be.
You taught me how to put myself second and to like it.
You taught me how to smile with my eyes as I looked into your tiny face. You taught me what joy was and you taught me how amazing it is to learn to laugh, roll (you rolled all over before you crawled), crawl, talk, and walk. You amazed me every day with your great powers to captivate me. You taught me to love.
Middle One, When You Were a Baby
Middle One, you taught me even more about a selfless life. I didn’t think I could learn more on that, but I was wrong. You taught me how to be patient and wait because I had to wait until I was nine days overdue before you arrived. You taught me to withstand trials as I endured induction of labor, failure to progress, natural labor, epidural, pitocin, and C-section before you finally landed in my arms.
You taught me to balance life as a mom of two kids under the age of three. Middle one, you taught me how to smile with a to-do list that never got done. You taught me cleaning is secondary to life and fun and food.
I saw the sweet joy in your eyes as you danced to any music you heard, even at the age of six months you danced while sitting. You made my soul dance.
Little One, When You Were a Baby
Little One, when you came along, the to-do list was gigantic and getting bigger each day. Eight years later I still don’t have that to-do list done, but I shove it off because I’ve learned to not care so much about it. You taught me to lower my standards for cleaning and housework even more and focus on the important things like holding you and feeding you, stopping your sadness. You taught me to be grateful for you because I lost the baby before you.
A great teacher you were, wise in your youth, you taught me to slow down and to focus on what mattered. What mattered was you.
You taught me to be strong and how to be a mama to three. You taught me my heart was big enough for all three of my babes, and you taught me my heart would grow bigger with love for all of you every year.
What you Taught Me as Toddlers
Oldest, When You Were a Toddler
Oldest, when you were a toddler, you taught me to love reading “The Early Bird” book thirteen times in a row in one sitting, because it was fun. It was your favorite book. You were about fifteen months old, and I read it to you thirteen times in a row. That was when you were my only and I could read a book to you that many times. I cherish that memory so much. I remember we sat on the cement of our patio, and I read it to you over and over again in the sunshine.
You were smart, you taught me how fun it was to play with blocks, play hide and seek, and play made up games like going on amazing imaginary missions from right in the middle of our living room. You taught me how to color and paint because I hadn’t done those things in years, you were my pioneer teacher back then.
It was a special time of just you as the first of my toddlers. You paved the way teaching me to mom a toddler. I learned a lot because you were a good teacher. You taught me a lot about the amazing world we live in such as how amazing bubbles are to pop and how fun and freeing it is to pick yellow dandelions in the summer breeze. How to gather them up in a bouquet and let them flop head heavy down the sides of your fist. Silly me, I had always thought they were weeds.
Middle One, When You Were a Toddler
Middle One, when you were a toddler, you taught me how I could do everything with you in tow. You taught me how I was findable in any room of the house.
You taught me perseverance reigns over frustration because you taught me to never give up until I found success in feeding you.
A great teacher rose out of you as you taught me how funny dogs ears were when they’d flap as they ran. You taught me how much fun it was swinging in the summer sun, and how it was still fun even after forty-five minutes of pushing. I didn’t know how fun that was until I saw your face and heard your giggles as you swung back and forth. I didn’t know how interesting worms were or how fascinating toy snakes were to toss around.
You were the smart one who taught me joy is in us all, we just need to let it breathe.
Related boy mom post with humor: 30 Hilarious Authentic Truths About Being a Boy Mom
Little One, When You Were a Toddler
Little One, when you were a toddler, you taught me to always be alert because you would run off. You always walked ahead or behind us so you taught me to swivel my head and walk without running into things.
You taught me that a moment’s fascination is more wonderful than a schedule. Again, you taught me my to-do list was dumb.
You taught me that giving myself grace was my best mom tool because being a mom was my most important role and it was always to stay at the top of the list. You taught me I could carry you, my purse, your sippy cup all at the same time while trying to calm you down and watching to make sure your two brothers were still following us.
Wise beyond your years, you taught me patience is a must, not a luxury. You were the most efficient in teaching me that things did not have to be perfect, and how I could be flexible. You taught me to focus on being a mom and shed distractions.
What you Taught Me as a Preschooler
Oldest, When You Were a Preschooler
Oldest, you taught me I could let you go to school and you would be ok. You taught me how you could have fun without me and how that was a good thing. You taught me how to try my hardest to meet a school schedule with a baby, because you wanted to go to school and play with friends. I learned to let you go a little bit and watch you soar on tiny preschooler arms into the world of learning and friends. It was my first step into being a bystander to your joy and fun as you told me about learning about bugs or how you and your friend made sand pies at school. You taught me joy comes in green paper bug projects and thumbprint flower magnets. I’ll never forget those lessons. They sit like sweet historical tokens on my walls.
Middle One, When You Were a Preschooler
Middle One, you taught me how exciting it was to go to school just like big brother. You taught me I could once again make a preschool schedule with a baby in tow and a big brother catching the bus to kindergarten. I learned how to shop quickly while you learned at school, and I learned how to cram in your little brother’s feeding session too before picking you up at school.
You taught me how to make things special for you and show you being the middle isn’t bad.
You were such a good teacher because you taught me how I could love the same exact school project your brother had made two years ago because this one had your creative twist on it. You taught me that even though it’s the same project, it’s so different because you were unique.
I learned to love impulsiveness from you as you were the master of impulsiveness as a preschooler. I learned from the best!
A favorite book you loved was “I Love You Stinky Face”:
Little One, When You Were a Preschooler
Little One, when you were a preschooler you taught me how fast time was really going. You taught me I could survive my last first day of preschool. You taught me I could let you go and have fun even though you were the baby of the family, and you didn’t yet seem ready to go out into the world. I learned from you how to relish moments of fun in making paint pictures with tiny preschool fingers as I volunteered up at your preschool. You taught me how having my last baby be a preschooler was an awesome thing because I could volunteer a lot at your school. Your enthusiasm for my volunteering guided me to dry my tears because you helped my motherhood grow up when it needed to.
You taught me you were an individual because you were the master of being who you innately were while still sort of following school rules.
The sun could never be as bright as your eyes or as fierce as your concentration when you set your mind to something, so you taught me the value of concentrating on a moment to the absolute max. Your attention span was an inspiration to me. You taught me to concentrate more and live in the moment more as each new thing to you was the last of everything toddler-mom for me.
What you Taught Me as an Elementary School Kid
Oldest, When You Were an Elementary School Kid
Oldest, you taught me to cry on the first day of kindergarten for joy and for the sadness that your time at home with me was done. You taught me how serious school was and how counting to one hundred was such a great accomplishment. You taught me to love moving forward even when part of my heart was still back at the day you were born.
A great teacher you were because you taught me to hold your hand and your heart, but at the same time let your heart go out into the great big world to explore. You taught me to enjoy your school experiences as a bystander. You taught me how to stand back and listen as you told me the joys of the school day. I had to accept that you left some jewels out, jewels I would never get the pleasure of knowing about. You taught me that was ok; that you were living your own life.
Oldest, you taught me how fast you would reach fifth grade and how I would be amazed and shocked at how big you got so fast. You taught me how to try to fix your problems but how I didn’t always have an answer that worked, but that I still loved you regardless, no matter what. I learned to be there for you even though you didn’t always tell me everything that bothered you anymore. You helped me know being available as a mom was the strongest thread between us and this bond would help you grow.
Middle One, When You Were an Elementary School Kid
Middle One, you taught me to cry on the first day of kindergarten for joy and for the sadness that your time at home with me was done. Also, you taught me kindergarten was meant for fun and you could handle it just as your big brother handled it.
The teacher in you taught me to love toilet paper binoculars. You were so right in how they worked better than my real ones! I was the lucky receiver of all the vast knowledge you learned at school, it all came spewing out of you the moment you came in the door. I learned to be patient and listen as you told every little speck of how Tom made up a game at recess and how you won and how at lunch it was delicious because it was Italian dunkers and how Logan told a story on the bus of how he got a new puppy, and I learned how you wanted to bring your toy snake for sharing the next day.
You taught me to let you get your own snack while I nursed the baby after school, and you taught me you could handle it just fine. You taught me you were growing up.
You taught me that time was starting to go too fast and I wanted it to slow down.
Little One, When You Were an Elementary School Kid
Little One, you taught me to cry on the first day of kindergarten for joy and for the sadness that your time at home with me was done. You taught me I could cry at kindergarten orientation, and try to hide my tears from other moms who hadn’t yet learned what I had learned. Rather than just feel joy, I learned I could feel bittersweet joy and cry for time gone by, but still have my heart burst with excitement seeing you smile as a new kindergartner.
You taught me I could survive time passage and my aging motherhood. Most importantly you taught me to start to live more in the moments as each new for you was a last for me. You were such a good teacher because I began to value each moment as a mom and ignore my to-do list even more. You’ve taught me my motherhood grows too just as you grow from year to year, so do I as your mom.
A favorite book you loved from kindergarten until second grade:
Oldest, as You Became a Teen
Oldest, you taught me I was old enough to be a mom of a teen, even though I didn’t feel old enough to be a mom of a teen. You’ve taught me I lost time with you when I was so busy with my to-do list back when I thought it was so important, and I mourn that loss. But at the same time, it helps me slow down now and savor my last years with you in my house.
Oldest, you taught me my first inklings of learning to let go, something I’m still struggling with now as you’ve passed into the teenage years. You see, I don’t want to let you go, I miss the baby you, the toddler you, the preschool you, the elementary school you, but I’m excited for all the you’s to come at the same time.
I am excited about your future.
Related post: Young Teen and Tween Boy Conversation Starters for Modern Moms
My Three Boys
My three boys, I’m excited for all three of your futures. My heart is still at each of your births, but it goes on to each new day with you, bursting with excitement for your next adventure.
My wonderful, amazing boys, I will do my best to keep learning from you. Know you are loved at every heartbeat of my heart. Know I think of you every breath I take because I know I’m still here, and I get the privilege of still living on this Earth as your mom.
Please know you are smart enough, strong enough, flexible enough to handle anything. Most of all know you should never give up. Seek your dreams. Keep God in your life.
Hold the hands of your babes while you can when you are parents, because the time goes faster than I ever thought it could.
Value life. Value hard work. Value yourself. You are worth it and you are important.
I love you big as the sun, colorful as the sunset, giant as the universe, deep as a soul, warm as a hug, sweet as a kiss, and blessed as a smile. I love you. I love you. I love you.
I am so lucky to be your mom.
Your biggest fan,
If you liked this letter, you might also like my post Young Teen and Tween Boy Conversation Starters for Modern Moms or 30 Hilarious Authentic Truths About Being a Boy Mom
Mother’s Day Post for those who are grieving: 21 Ways to Honor Your Mom on Mother’s Day After She Has Passed Away
For mom self-care: Self-care tips for busy moms.
Dealing with the many emotions of motherhood: Help for Moms: Why We Should Admit How We Really Feel
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This is a wonderful idea to write letters to each on of your boys. My case two boys and a girl. Going to remember this.
Julie Hoag says
Thank you! Thanks for reading and for the comment!
Corey | The Nostalgia Diaries says
I love this post – your boys will cherish these words when they are older!
Julie Hoag says
Hi, Thank you so much! I hope they will cherish the words when they are older. Thanks for the comment!
Elise Cohen Ho says
This is a heartwarming post. In many ways I feel as if our blogs are one giant letter to our children.
Julie Hoag says
Yes, I know what you mean 🙂 Thanks reading and leaving the comment. I do hope my boys read it someday!!