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Julie Hoag Writer

What To Tell Kids Every Day Of Middle School

August 31, 2017

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Facing the new gigantic sea of middle school. What to Tell Kids every day of middle school.
Facing the new gigantic turbulent sea of middle school. Parents need to help prepare tweens every day. Photo credit: Julie Hoag

Do you remember middle school? I sure do, and I remember it being awkward. I felt self-conscious all the time. I thought middle school was a tough time and simply a phase to endure.

Kids may tell parents they are scared when they are about to start middle school, or they may hide their fear. Some kids may even say they are excited, but most will have a bit of fear on some level because there are so many unknowns in the gigantic turbulent sea of middle school. Kids will experience many new things in middle school. I’m a seasoned mom of middle school kids so I’m sharing my advice about What To Tell Kids Every Day Of Middle School.

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These are simple suggestions that may seem obvious, but saying them out loud rather than assuming kids already know them solidifies these ideas in their heads. Tweens need a giant amount of parental support.

Tweens are hot, cold, and every temp in between. Parents need to be there for them no matter what. We need to be that supportive wave in the unknown sea.

I love you-Tweens Need To Hear This Every Day

I always say I love you to my kids. They usually say it back, but I wouldn’t even care if they said it back or not. I love it when they do say it back, but what is most important is that they know I love them. Kids at this age have extreme emotions and one day they may feel close to their parents and feel love. The next day they may pull away from their parents or even be so angry to yell I hate you!

My boys need to know my love is unconditional for them. I will always love them because they are my kids; this must be a concrete ever-lasting nugget in their heads. Being my kid is the  only criteria I need to give them unconditional love. My kids need to know I am here for them no matter what. I want them to know I am on their side. I’m in their court. I’m walking with them.

They need that support and that knowledge as they step off into the world. I want my kids to know that whether they have a stellar day or a bad day, I will always love them. If they become a victim of a bully or ridicule or even light undesirable teasing, my I love you will still be a memory fresh in their heads all day because I said it as they went out the door. That phrase will be in their heads no matter what joy or atrocity they face for the day.

They need homemade Mom Love.


Say I love you every day to kids
Say I love you every day to kids. Homemade Mom love 🙂 Photo credit: Julie Hoag

 

Have a Good Day

I want my boys to know I’m thinking about them and their experiences at school. I care about how their day goes and I want to hear about it. My kids should know in their hearts that I want to know about their day because it’s important to me as their mom. I want them to know I wish the best for them. What they go through is important and I want to be there as their guide.

If my son wants to tell me a teacher was mean, or what his friend Joe did to make him laugh in Science, I want to know about it. I want to know if Katie was annoying again or if the cute girl smiled at him from across the locker bay. It’s important to me to be as much a part of their school life as possible. I want them to keep talking to me.

To get ideas for conversation starters for tweens, read this related post: Young Teen and Tween Boy Conversation Starters for Modern Moms

Have a Good Lunch

I care about my kids’ enjoyment at lunch both socially with friends and for the pleasure of eating good food. I want my kids to have fun at lunch and have joy in eating yummy food they choose (so many more lunch choices in middle school). Feeding my kids yummy food has been important to me since I started feeding them baby food so I want them to know that I still care about their meal. What they eat and if they got full still matters to me in my mothering of them.

Tomorrow is a new day, so if today doesn’t go as you had hoped, wait for tomorrow

Even before their day starts, I want to remind them a new day is coming with new and exciting potentials. I believe this will give them hope as they navigate their day. Whether they have a great day and burst with excitement spilling stories the second they walk through the door, or if they fall in the door stumbling with a down face and frown; I want them to have a precious hope for tomorrow foundation in their heads.

Tweenhood is a hard age. Tweens are changing rapidly in their appearance, in their thought processes, and in their social skills. They are trying out new skills so being self-conscious with a low self-esteem is common. What worked to make friends in elementary school may not work in middle school. Some days are tough, some are smooth, but tomorrow is a fresh start. Always.

 

What to tell tweens every day of middle school
Photo credit: Pexels

 

Don’t Let Others Define You

Kids can be cruel, especially at the tween age. Peer opinions are super important to them. Kids need to be reminded that they don’t have to believe what others perceive about them. They don’t have to believe what others say about them. Kids need to know they define themselves and they don’t need to follow what others say. I tell my boys to do their best and to not let others cut them down, and seriously, don’t believe a lie just because someone spewed it out. The offensive remarking kids might be jealous or trying to make themselves look better so I tell my kids to not give away that power of self-definition. They alone own that.

You Are a Talented Person

Kids need to know they have talents. I remind my boys of their talents frequently, not to make them over-confident and egotistical, but to boost their confidence. Their confidence may takes hits during the day at school, so I build them up with compliments to help them weather negative comments by peers. Everyone has God instilled talents so often I find I need to remind my kids of their talents. They need me to say it and the more I say it, the more they will believe it themselves. Repetition is beneficial here.

 

Tell kids their after school schedule so they know what to expect. MIddle school tweens.
Tell kids their after school schedule so they know what to expect. Photo credit: Pexels

 

Your Schedule After School is…….

I like to remind my boys of their after school or evening events each morning so they already have it in their mind-set as they walk in the door after school. This way they won’t assume they have a free night and feel stress when they hear they don’t have free time. I believe knowing their schedule ahead of time reduces their stress and makes transitions smoother.

Yes, Middle School is a Tough Age, but Parents Can Help

Remember how much babies change in their first year of life? Tweens are like that in middle school. The hormones kick in and they may experience giant changes in their appearances and emotions in a short amount of time. That is a lot to learn to be comfortable with and still function as a student at the same time.

Middle school is a tough age for kids but with parent help, they can make it through and perhaps even blossom. My goal is to assist my boys through the tough tween years to be as healthy as possible, plus, to help them be prepared for tackling the teen years. Teenhood…another post for another time.

I hope my list helps all of you who are families with tweens in middle school. For more advice on middle school, please check out my post Authentic Helpful Advice For Tweens Entering Middle School

 

What To Tell Kids Every Day of Middle School. #tweens #tweensmiddleschool #middleschool #tipsforschool #backtoschool #tipsformiddleschool tips for middle schoolers ideas #parenttipsforschool back to school-middle school tweens-parent advice #parentingtweens #parentingtweenboys #parentingtweensandteens #motheringboys #motheringtips motherhood-mother to tweens-mom to mom advice @juliehoagwriter.com
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22 Comments
Filed Under: Family Tagged: kids, motherhood, parent advice, son, teen, teens

Comments

  1. Deryn | Running on Real Food says

    August 31, 2017 at 11:34 am

    I definitely could have used this in middle school, for sure it’s an awkward and self-conscious time. Lucky kids you’ve got!

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 1, 2017 at 12:18 am

      Thanks! Our kiddos need all the support they can get:)

      Reply
  2. celeste says

    August 31, 2017 at 11:36 am

    Thanks for this advice. Crazy to think my little lady will be in school before I know it!

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 1, 2017 at 12:19 am

      Yes, time goes so fast! I believe the phrase is the days are long but the years are short, and it’s so true! Thanks!!

      Reply
  3. Rachel Catherine says

    September 1, 2017 at 9:49 am

    These are great tips. I’m practically in tears just thinking about middle school. I have to save this. I feel like I need to tell my daughter this now.

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 1, 2017 at 6:32 pm

      Oh, I agree, middle school is such a tough time for kids. I agree, kids of all ages can benefit from parents saying those things. I just see so many kids with plummeting self-esteem in middle school, it’s such a delicate and emotional time for kids. Thanks for reading and for your comment!!

      Reply
  4. April@LoveOurRealLife says

    September 1, 2017 at 1:04 pm

    Very timely…my son just started middle school and it is such a challenging time for kids this age. Great tips!

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 1, 2017 at 6:33 pm

      Yes, it is SO challenging! So many changes, new things, and they are still growing and maturing. Thanks and good luck to your son, I hope he has a great year!!

      Reply
  5. Rachel says

    September 2, 2017 at 9:53 am

    I’m not quite there to this stage yet, but this is SO helpful to know. I will never stop telling my kids, every morning, how much I love them. and I already tell my 5 year old his schedule every morning — just to set the expectations for the day!

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 2, 2017 at 9:07 pm

      Yes, I think it’s so important to say those things to our kids too. It reassures them and sets them up for their day. Thanks so much!!

      Reply
  6. Kristen says

    September 2, 2017 at 1:15 pm

    This is such a great post. My daughter is just 3 but I have young/teenage nieces and nephews who definitely need to hear these things every day. This world can be very discouraging especially for the young ones.

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 2, 2017 at 9:08 pm

      Yes, it can be very discouraging, we need to support the tweens and teens in our lives to help them through the rough times. Thanks for the comment!!

      Reply
  7. Meredith says

    September 4, 2017 at 9:51 am

    My niece just started middle school last week and I will definitely be using some of these tips to help her adjust! I remember middle school all too well…

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 4, 2017 at 1:57 pm

      Yes, I think middle school is a very memorable time for all, some bad, some good. I hope your neice has an awesome year!!! Thanks!!

      Reply
  8. Jordan | Read. Eat. Repeat. says

    September 4, 2017 at 9:54 am

    My kids are still little (2 and 4) but I hope I will remember to tell them these things when they get to middle school. I feel like these are great reminders for kids of all ages though, and even adults!

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 4, 2017 at 1:58 pm

      Yes, I agree, it is good to remind kids of all ages (and adults!) of these things. It’s so important for us to support our kids so they can grow up healthy. Thanks!!!

      Reply
  9. Jordyn Galan says

    September 4, 2017 at 6:59 pm

    These are great tips for when my son gets to that age!

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 5, 2017 at 1:03 am

      I hope my article helps:)

      Reply
  10. Anne | onedeterminedlife says

    September 4, 2017 at 8:53 pm

    I’m not there yet so just enjoying the years before middle school

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 5, 2017 at 1:05 am

      Yes, enjoy your kiddos! Every age is awesome and with it’s own challenges. Cherish all the stages of motherhood:)

      Reply
  11. Shell says

    September 21, 2017 at 11:35 am

    I enjoyed this post but the one thing that stood out to me is telling your kids at the beginning of the day what their schedule is for that day… I homeschool but I find doing that makes our day go smoother because he knows what to expect…

    Reply
    • Julie Hoag says

      September 21, 2017 at 2:29 pm

      Yes, I completely agree. It helps them to know what’s coming up for the day. Thanks!

      Reply

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Hello & Welcome! I’m Julie. I’m a wife and a mom to 3 boys. I’m sharing Ideas for Recipes, Family Lifestyle, Travel, DIY & Pets:) I’m SO happy you are here! Leave me a comment, I’d love to hear from you. I’m also a YA Author of the novel “Hungry Hearts” published in 2020 with Swoon Romance/Month9Books and Georgia McBride. “Out of Control” releases in 2021.

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